Humans are complex beings, and, in my opinion, women are even more complex. More specifically, in the Black community, we have a history of jealousy, discord, competition (normally centered around gaining attention from men) and pain within female-to-female relationships. We see this in those popular reality shows such as “The Housewives” series. Yes, maybe TV amplifies issues for ratings sake, but, if we were really on the up and up in these relationships, producers would have nothing to work with to portray our interactions in such a negative light.
In my early 30s, a sudden shift happened in the dry season that had lasted over 10 years of my nonexistent dating life. My heart cried out to God and He heard me. I asked God to move and He did. The floodgates opened, and y’all, it was literally raining men 😂🌧💃🏾. This new experience of hearing God say “yes” (with boundaries) is so opposite of hearing Him say “no” for so long that the sudden onslaught of attention and interest still has not been the easiest to navigate. In fact, I’ve had plenty of pitfalls, tear-stained nights and burdensome conversations. That being said, I also have had SO MUCH FUN.
I sat in the Starbucks location 10 minutes from work using my early arrival as needed time to recoup from the day. I was meeting an old high school friend and would need the short break to gather energy for the meeting. Not because my time with her would not be enjoyable but simply because… Continue reading When You’ve Come A Long Way
Nicole never gives up. Nicole cares more for others than for herself. Nicole doesn’t want what she doesn’t have. She doesn’t strut. She doesn’t have a swelled head. Nicole doesn’t force herself on others, She isn’t always “me first”. Nicole doesn’t fly off the handle. She doesn’t keep score of the sins of others, She… Continue reading Great Insides
I stood in the bathroom mirror and struggled with my emotions. My ipod was blaring party music and it was my big day. But so many seemed as if they wouldn’t show and fear was overcoming my thoughts. Finally I heard the Lord. “Nicole, you need to rejoice regardless of your circumstances”. He made it very clear… Continue reading Joy On The Inside
So my friend had this idea for us (me, her and our other friends in common) to share our “weaknesses/imperfections” and how those things are a part of us, and hopefully how they can be viewed as “good”. And I decided to post mine on this here blog, because, well…why not? :-). Plus, I think… Continue reading Random Things About Me
I’ve found myself in recovery from the removal of codependent relationships. Some have lasted more than a decade. And though it is now freeing to experience life in this new and healthier way, it is also scary and makes me feel extremely vulnerable. But I guess that is how anyone feels when they’ve been addicted… Continue reading Where I’m at These Days
I’m not a man so I can’t fathom the temptation to engage a beautiful, godly, woman in conversation. To proceed with texting her, calling her, and showering her with terms of endearment (via social media or otherwise), all the while having no intention to commit to her. I can’t possibly fathom that temptation. I’m not… Continue reading A Letter to My Single Brothers
She’s like a sister to me. Her brother is like a brother to me. Her family is like family to me. When we have conflict it’s like a huge space in my life that can’t be filled. When we were younger we had full out arguments. Now, seasoned with some maturity, we have conflict. It’s… Continue reading A Conflict of Sorts