Tag Archive | overcoming fear

Life Without Fear

It’s funny how long you can go living in a state that is less than ideal. Your life has been that way for so long you don’t know any better. It is your normal, even when it is abnormal. Who are you if that thing changes? What will your life look like in this new state?

A couple of years ago I had a great awakening of unhealthy ways I was functioning in in my relationships. I realized I was hurting my loved ones and they were hurting me. Thankfully I was in enough pain to choose change. 

Often we must be in enough pain before we choose change. 

That experience was more enjoyable than the current season I have been in where once again unhealthy things surfaced and God was calling me to change.

This time darkness surrounded me and confusion set in when I confronted the dysfunction. This particular battle would not be quick. No, this would be a fight like none I had ever faced because I wasn’t fighting against an external opponent as in times past. The real battle was against myself.

I pulled out the old weapons but they weren’t working. I had to learn how to use better tools for this greater level of warfare.

I’m taught that fear is a learned behavior. Science proves our bodies are naturally wired for love. Fear only comes in when we learn it. That means fear is something natural and not eternal. Every natural thing has an end. But how many allow fear to dictate their lives? How many are comfortable with fear being a steady companion?  Too many.

I wrestled and wrestled but my foe would not be vanquished. I was so afraid. I felt this giant must be bigger than I. Maybe bigger than God.  Then one day I had a question in my heart: 

“Who are you Nicole?” And I knew the answer, “I’m a warrior”. Then He said, “Then fight!” 

The truth is I wasn’t fighting with all my might. I was holding back waiting for Him to rescue me.  So I obeyed His command.  And do you know what happened? I wrestled the negative thoughts to the ground and won!  The fear was gone. For the first time. It wasn’t “managed” or ” redirected”.  It was gone.

This new life, the one without fear, is still taking some getting used to. I still must be intentional about my thoughts and focusing on truth.  But the victory I’ve had is motivation enough to see what other victories I can accumulate.

And so I must ask, “Who are you my friend?” If you are a warrior, then do what warrors do, and fight!  

SHALOM

Facing and Slaying Your Giants

Numbers‬ ‭13:30-33‬ ‭

Then Caleb quieted the people before Moses, and said, “Let us go up at once and take possession, for we are well able to overcome it.” But the men who had gone up with him said, “We are not able to go up against the people, for they are stronger than we.” And they gave the children of Israel a bad report of the land which they had spied out, saying, “The land through which we have gone as spies is a land that devours its inhabitants, and all the people whom we saw in it are men of great stature. There we saw the giants ( the descendants of Anak came from the giants); and we were like grasshoppers in our own sight, and so we were in their sight.”
In this passage the Isrealites have just come from Canaan, a land flowing with milk and honey. A land of much fruit. The Lord told them to go there in preparation to receive their promise land. The problem was the promise seemed to have giants in it. When the spies went they found the reward God spoke of but it pailed in comparison to the enemy they would need to fight for it. Atleast, in their minds it did.  

Many of us are familiar with this passage and we know the outcome. We know that over and over again Yaweh proved His deity. He had delivered the Israelites so many times. He had rescued them from slavery, showed His hand with powerful plagues and even fed them with manna to sustain them in the wilderness! They witnessed so many signs and wonders at His hand one would think they could never doubt Him. But when it came to the promise, they became fearful of their own stature. They became fearful of what seemed to be larger than who they were.

Maybe that is what happens when we look to ourselves to overcome the battle? We become smaller in our own site and our enemy is magnified. I have faced some “giants” in this season. I have wondered if God would deliver…could deliver. Even after all of the miracles I have experienced. Yes He helped me to overcome then but could He overcome THIS situation? If He could, wouldn’t He have done it by now?

Notice the Lord did not speak to the Israelites about these “giants” beforehand. He only spoke to them about the promise. He only said “This is the land I am giving you”. I believe God doesn’t tell us about the giants because they are not giants to Him. All enemies will be used to take us further into our destiny and calling. I also believe He does not waste His time on what is temporary. Giants are temporary. The real promise lasts forever…

In this passage Caleb shares that he too scoped out the land but he was certain they could have victory. What did Caleb see that the other spies did not? I believe He saw the eternal. He saw with the lense of the Lord. He did not see the temporary but He saw the eternal victory that is wrapped in the Word of promise.

Rest assured He has already spoken your victory over you. The giant isn’t really a giant at all. It is just another tool to propel your forward into purpose.

SHALOM

Taking the Leap

Yesterday my mom called extremely upset. Her beloved flip phone had died. While she shared her angst at her current predicament, I beamed for joy. It was time for an upgrade! We made our way to the Verizon location of her choice and spent 2 hours reviewing, discussing and finally settling on the perfect purchase for her. Now, for the uninformed you must know my mother is super old school. She does not like change and if that old flip phone of hers had not finally given up the ghost, well, there is no telling when she would have taken the leap into smart phone land. But leap she did! Even when the sales rep tried to offer her the little phone that has the key board that slides out (which is a step up from the flip phone but not as savvy as the smart phone) she was torn. I had already groomed her for the smart phone. I had already been introducing her to text messaging and was getting her comfortable for this change. In the end all of my efforts paid off. She was the owner of her very first smart phone.  
I tell this story because I know it is a picture of God’s goodness towards us. Sometimes we are fearful of the blessing simply b/c it means change. Our wounds, our pain, our poverty can be comfortable and for that reason alone we hold on tight to our current state. I myself am struggling to walk in freedom from a poverty mindset and walk boldly towards the promotion and blessings God has promised. But yesterday, I knew that my role was to help my mother transition. I knew that when fear tried to keep her in her comfort zone I was to encourage her to do what she really desired to do: receive the more. “Don’t settle” I told her. And I knew I was talking to myself. I watched her feel disappointed when presented with the keyboard phone. I felt her confusion. Should she get this one? It wasn’t really what she wanted but it was a step up from the flip phone. Here’s the thing, we don’t always need to make contact on each step. Sometimes, we can skip a few, simply b/c we have been so faithful on the step we were on. Sometimes we were there too long and God wants to get us to the top of the staircase faster as a result!  

In this season He has opened up so many doors of ministry for me with my book. Just today I was told that I needed to be utilized now b/c when the door in my career opens I won’t have time. I have been told that a few times and have not really believed it until told once again today. Maybe I won’t have time for these things in the next season. Either way I have every intention of being about my Father’s business TODAY.

I am saddened by the loss of lives terrorism and crazy people are causing in this generation. It makes me so sad. It also gives me a sense of urgency. My life is but a vapor. The window of time I have may seem long but that is deception. There are only a number of days I have, a number of months, a number of years for me to impact this generation for the kingdom’s sake.  

I don’t have time for fear.  

I must walk by faith, take the leap and receive the blessing.

  
SHALOM