Have you ever tried to control God? Not like blatantly tell Him what to do because you know that would be silly but instead you plan and plot and secretly put time limits on Him when it comes to occurrences of your life. So really its like you are trying to control your life but since He is the Author of your life it’s really Him you are trying to control.
And even though I’m saying “you” I actually am speaking to myself here.
I heard a preacher recently say we have faith as long as we can see how God will move. We all have an expiration date to our faith. I agree with that statement. I had so much faith and thought my faith was limitless. Now I know it is the faith of the Son that is limitless. My own faith runs out eventually when the waiting gets too long. When I realize that God is not moving in my time frame or opening doors in my fashion or even opening the doors that I want opened. No matter how many times I pass these tests I seem to default to this false way of thinking and functioning.
I default to control.
In this transition period it took me a while to realize that the open door I was waiting for was already open. It took me a while to see the work He put before me is the assignment to focus on and once again I needed to Be Present. I needed to live in the NOW. I needed to adjust my expectations, stop putting limits on Him, stop trying to control Him, and humble myself. When I asked Him why I always seem to be in this predicament of being tested through waiting and humility His response was that He is chastising me.
He chastises those He loves.
My good friend told me “God is trying to catch up our character with out gifts!” I think she is right. I see now this is a lifelong process. I am once again submitting to the process.
And relinquishing control.