On Saturday I attended my 4th and final wedding of the year. Well, it was really my 3rd as I did not make the 2nd one I was invited to. But I did make the reception so I’m going to count this as my 4th. Anyways, I was touched by the intimacy and love that consumed the atmosphere through the attended guests. I had a seat right in the back and had a good look at the bridal party as they made their way down the aisle. One thing that is the same in all of the weddings I’ve attended is the anticipation of seeing the bride. It’s like everyone that walks down the aisle before her are just adding to the anticipation of her great entrance. And since weddings are a picture of our wedding with Christ, I think it’s interesting that Christ would put His Bride on display in such a way. I mean, He is the one who is awesome and wonderful and amazing. Shouldn’t He be the center of attention? And therefore, shouldn’t the groom? But I guess it is typical that Christ would put the focus on us (His bride). He is so selfless that way. I can’t imagine His eagerness and excitement as He awaits His bride to walk down the aisle, forever giving herself to Him…
I’m not going to lie, I often forget the true purpose of weddings and marriage and such. I get caught up in the culture’s perception of it all. My selfish perception of it all. But when I’m sane and thinking clearly, I know it really is all about Him.
My story really is all about Him.
I hear Him asking me these days, “Nicole, will you trust me with your story?” “Will you let me write your story?” He’s such a gentlemen. He has already written my story. He wrote it before I was born. But He wants my heart to be in agreement with what He has written. He wants me to choose His path, because I do have a choice. I have been so afraid of the story He has written for me. I have been so afraid of His plan and His ways. They have been so different than mine. I can only make this choice one day at a time. I can only agree with Him as I take one step forward each day.
At the last wedding I had a grand time with friends who are more like family. No longer is there that jealousy that haunted me in my 20s. I realize now that God has a unique path for each person and He chooses to give good gifts in accordance with each child’s calling. I realize now that I am not entitled to anything and must be grateful for everything He has given me which is more than enough for this season. He knows what is best for us. There is still that hardship that comes along with denying one’s own desires for the sake of the kingdom. There are the typical questions about my relationship status that many women face when they are over 30 and the time window for children seems to be diminishing.
One funny occurrence in my experience is that men are being drawn to me in this season and thus I am actually having to turn down interested parties. I turn them down because God turns them down. I trust He’s doing it because He has something better.
I was talking with my friend’s aunt last night about relationship stuff. My upcoming book spurred on the topic and thus we entered into dialogue that went a little something like this:
“Nicole, you are beautiful and I don’t know why you are single. I’m surprised you don’t have a lot of men pursuing you”.
“Well, there are men and have been men but not the right man. The right man needs to be qualified. He needs to be the whole package just as I am the whole package.”
“Well, I hate to say it but those men are rare.”
“You’re right, they are rare. But I know I need to trust God with His choice and timing for what He has for me”.
I could not always say those words. I have settled so many times in the area of men and relationships. That has been my great weakness. But God is showing me that where I am weak, He is strong.
And so He is writing my story. He has already written it and even used me to share some of it in my upcoming book.
In what ways are you letting God write your story? Here is a pic I’m in love with right now LOL…