People who are described as “sensitive” tend to be deep feelers. Everyone feels, but people who are regarded as being “more sensitive” are very sensitive to the
emotions that they feel. And not just their emotions but other people’s too. They pick up on moods and atmospheres and even thoughts easily. The benefit of this way of functioning is these people make great intercessors. They can sense the burdens of others and pray with the same fervency for that person as if they themselves were experiencing that burden. They can release the burden to the Father when that person isn’t capable to pray for themselves. They “stand in the gap” and the Father responds in movement to the intercessor’s cries as if it were the person himself who were crying. This sounds pretty cool to be able to be used in that way, but like with all things this side of heaven, this gift was affected by the fall of mankind. The drawback to being a “deep feeler” is that often you let your feelings dictate your outlook and response. Your feelings are so strong they overcome you and lead you. When feelings are in the drivers seat, there is no telling where the car will end up parked.
For months now I have let anxiety rule. And then fear. And then doubt. It has been a battle, and it wasn’t until the other day when I asked God why He was allowing this battle to go on for so long that I was reminded that the true war is not against fear, or anxiety or doubt. The true war is against the true self being revealed.
The war is over identity.
The whole earth is groaning and waiting for the Sons of God (Elohim) to be revealed (Romans 8:28).
I was asked by the Holy Spirit,
“Nicole do you believe you are an eternal being and that you are functioning from the heavenly places you are seated in? Do you believe you are delegating and demonstrating in the natural that which is eternal?”
“Yes Lord, I believe”.
I had grace to believe this one truth even while so many other beliefs were coming under attack. And focusing on the truth that I am an eternal being, functioning from an eternal place, helped put things in perspective. It helped my emotions simmer down, temporarily.
Emotions are indicators. Anxiety is an indicator that something is wrong. It was an indication that something I was believing was wrong. For nearly four months now I have been “white knuckling” it. I have tried everything in my power to get a quick fix or a fast deliverance, but all attempts have failed. I have finally faced the truth that I need outside help. That line of thinking is so contrary to my personality. I always want to be “strong”. I am usually the “go to” person when others are in need of encouragement. But after nearly four months I have to face facts: I need help.
I have to let go and realize my story is still being written. Even though I am promised a great ending, I don’t know the details of the in between.