This weekend I put the pedal to the metal. Literally. My BFF planned to celebrate her b day in style and I planned to be there. Even in my planning I couldn’t have foreseen the significance of my presence. There have been so many shifts in my life in regards to my relationships in this season. Long time relationships have either changed or halted altogether. It’s good though b/c God is doing a new thing. He’s doing a new thing in me and therefore a new thing in my close relationships.
I made my way to Cinci and partook in the various B Day festivities my friend had planned. I was even able to bless her with a pedicure and manicure at the suggestion of my Manicurist. We then ran errands and she taught me what the word “deputize” meant by allowing me to be her hands while she gave instructions. I couldn’t help but feel blessed to serve her every step of the way. God’s word that “it is better to give than to receive” is true. Our sinful nature desires to be self-centered, but His spirit in us loves to give. One may fall into a comfort zone of receiving in relationships but if given the chance, and if we are maturing, we will crave the opportunity to give.
We just need that opportunity.
I was able to use my gifts to serve her and demonstrate my unconditional love for her and throughout the course of the weekend I watched her flourish. I’ve known this woman over 10 years and to see her transformation in this season is like watching a butterfly emerge from a cocoon. Recently I have watched her walls of protection crumble. I’ve seen her invite others into those secret places. I’ve watched her true self being revealed (Romans 8:22). She was so blessed by my presence but for me it was simply a reflection of what she had offered to me this year on my birthday.
As we have gotten older, we have both had to put those dreams of marriage and family on the back burner. It was so clear to me this weekend how much singles need community. Singles need someone there to celebrate with. A companion to do life with. This journey of being single over 30 with no children has been a painful process and we are still walking through that. But I’m so glad we have each other to walk with. We have changed so much these 13 years, but our hearts for Him have not. Our desire to wait for His best survived the distractions and detours we have taken along the way. Maybe there are more detours ahead, but for now we focus on the hope that there aren’t. The hope that as we are getting healthy we will attract healthier people into our lives. I think the transformation in our own friendship is proof that this hope will be fulfilled at the appointed time.
”You really love me!” she said several times throughout the weekend and I knew it was the Father hammering home that message into her heart. She and I have both struggled with receiving love from loved ones in the past and therefore struggled with offering it. But now, we are healing. And as a result we are growing.
Her theme for this year was “Here’s to the Future” and we made vision boards together. There was a part of me that was afraid to share my dreams and glue pictures of my hopes on the board for all to see. There was a part of my heart that was laced with pain from the seemingly hope deferred and unmet desires. But there was a part that knew we walk by faith and God in His care and consideration of us is leading us closer to the fruition of those promises, even if they seem so far away. So we made our visions boards and shared our dreams. And I can’t help but feel the Father is pleased with us. Happy 32nd B Day my friend! May God blow your mind with His plans for your life!😊