One Year Later: V Day

So this time last year I was meeting my guy for our first date which just so happened to be on V Day. We went ice skating and it was something out of one of those sappy Lifetime movies (which are BTW now on Netflix!). My eyes fell on him and he was gorgeous. We held hands as we made our way around the outside rink. We took breaks and warmed our freezing limbs by the fire. We made conversation with other skaters and I soaked in the novelty of it all. I was on a date! A really good date! With a guy I really liked! Whose life was this??? After ice skating we visited the art museum which was another first for me. We made our way through sculptures and paintings and I could not get over the fact that I was a part of a couple. For nearly 10 years I had not had that experience and it was pretty surreal to me. We had dinner and talked for hours. We shared dreams and plans for the future and I was overwhelmed with the picture that was being painted before me. The night ended with flowers, a card and a good night kiss. It was all pretty incredible.

But not God’s choice.

And I had to learn the hard way the effects of not guarding my heart. Again. Because apparently nearly 10 years of singleness hadn’t matured me as much as I thought it had. There was still much wisdom I needed to learn in the area of men, relationships and myself. And God was going to use this relationship to teach me what I was in need of learning. I found myself walking away by His leading and seeking Him for answers.

His answer? Went something like the following:

Nicole, I have created you before the world began and you are Mine. There is no one and nothing I would not give you that is not a part of my will. I created you for My good pleasure and I have only My best for you. I sing over you with songs of thanksgiving because I am thankful for you and I desire for you to see Me in the fullness of my love for you. I will use all things in your life to continue directing your gaze to me so that you are fully saturated in the essence of my presence.

Shortly thereafter God led me to publish my book “How to Overcome Heartbreak”. There are many who face heartbreak and overcome it. I have overcome it several times with parents, friends and romantic relationships. I see now the reason I have faced these situations with heartbreak is because I have not guarded my heart. I have allowed these people to be in a place in my heart that is reserved only for the Creator.

Truly He is jealous over us.

This Valentine’s Day, I will not be on a date. I will be celebrating the release of my book with my first release book party with loved ones. I’ve learned that romance is a poor foundation for marriage. Romance is only the byproduct of a sure foundation which consists of: selflessness, maturity and character. This Valentine’s Day I choose these qualities over romance. And I know God is pleased because for the first time in nearly 10 years, I see and appreciate the wisdom in the path He chose for me.

Maybe you are still desiring that romantic date. Maybe you are struggling and wishing you could take part in the typical festivities that mark this holiday. I understand. But know this: your Father sees your sacrifice. He sees that you are waiting for His best and desiring His will for your life. And He will reward you in the best way possible that is tailor made for you (Heb 11: 23-26, Gen 15:1).

He has not forgotten His promises over you.

Please check out my interview for my book: How to Overcome Heartbreak: Recovering from Misguided Love and pass on to anyone who could benefit from my testimony.


By Nicole D. Miller

Nicole D. Miller is an author and heartfelt writer, as expressed on her blog Better Than Wine. Her books are published at and on Amazon. She loves all things “old school” hip-hop and R&B, along with any outfit that involves cute boots and thick scarves. She even manages to run her own bookkeeping business ( when she’s not cuddling her cute cat she fondly calls, “Squeaks”.

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