I felt God moved greatly in giving me revelation of the seasons and cycles on His calendar. I was hearing Holy Spirit tell me “Nicole, you must understand My times and seasons”. I reached out to a brother who recommended “A Time to Advance” by Chuck Pierce. I delayed in reading it but actually read it right on time. I read it during a time of serious testing. Revelation, wisdom and understanding flowed off its pages and much confirmation was given for the test I was facing at that time.
God moves in seasons and cycles.
God moves in ways that are higher than mine.
God wants me to understand His ways.
The test I was going through at the beginning of the year was to propel me forward into my eternal identity. It delivered me from idolatry and further solidified God’s plan for my life. I was in a place of choosing Ishmael over Isaac and by God’s grace I chose Isaac. I never want to have to choose Isaac again.
But did Ayin Dalet apply to me on a personal level? I was hoping to see great doors open in the area of relationships and my career. I saw doors open and then I saw them close. There were some doors slightly ajar in my life and I feel Jesus drop kicked them wide open. Love, restoration and healing flowed freely through these doors and loved ones drew near. And I drew near to them.
“Lean not to your own understanding” Christ said. “In all your ways acknowledge Him”. This scripture has stalked me all year long. Because I wanted to lean unto my own understanding. I wanted to choose my own way. Why could I not choose Ishmael? Why wouldn’t it just work out the way I wanted it to? But God has something better. And in the coming months He would teach me why His way was better and why my way was skewed and based on illusion.
My career has been a series of Josephs and Moses. Years ago God gave me a picture of how emotional Moses must have been when Pharaoh kept saying that “yes” he would let God’s people go, and then “no” he would not. I was going through a similar experience on my job and every time an opportunity seemed to present itself the door would close. Until finally, a door opened. Well, it’s been like that again. More testing. More elevation and then de-elevation. But now I see that this world is so temporary. God uses these temporary things to keep our eyes on Him. We cannot hold on to anything in this world. And He has revealed my true assignment. My true occupation. It is eternal. It is something no one can even understand in the natural.
So upon review of Ayin Dalet, yes many doors opened and some closed. The doors I wanted opened did not open but God has opened the door of my heart and I think that is really what He was after. Intimacy, Trust, Maturity. These are keys I have obtained over the course of this Hebraic year.
Last year this time I was steeped in sin. I was entangled and distracted. I was heartbroken and in pain. Sometimes my heart still hurts, but He is bringing forth so much healing and growth that I can hardly complain.
I look forward to continuing forward in this journey with Him as I know that all things are working together for my good. No matter the time, the season or the year.