Thoughts on Purity

I want to preface this post by saying I am hardly the poster child for purity. But then again neither are you. Only Christ is our standard. The good news is Christ lives within us and He empowers us through the Holy Spirit to do “all things”. That includes living a life of purity.

My journey with purity has been much like other aspects of my life, laced with warfare. Love and emotions and passion and sexuality were awakened prematurely and the fruit of these awakenings bound me up and tried to take me under. Time and time again. These cords of wickedness made their attempts to keep not only myself bound but so many in my family bloodline. I know it saddened my own mother when I walked down the same path she had and gave my body as a teen. She did not understand the seeds that had already been planted years in advance for me to make such a naïve decision. R-rated movies, explicit music and the like were invading my gates even as a toddler. We were ignorant of the effects of such devices. Thankfully, I am no longer ignorant of Satan’s devices.

I often wonder how will I teach my own children about purity? How can I create a healthy environment for them to learn about sexual matters in a safe way that will not awaken love prematurely? First and foremost I desire to teach them about emotional purity. In my experience sexual immorality has stemmed from my heart not being guarded and protected from immoral emotional happenings. Long, inappropriate conversations and text messages leading to one-on-one time with no accountability. Boundaries become bent and then broken. All of a sudden the black and white lines of conviction blur into 50 shades of gray and justifications for sin occur. Even though it’s been a rocky road, I can see how Christ began creating a hedge around me to restore His purity within me. At one point in time He had removed all male contacts from my phone. He had removed all of my emotional affairs. It broke my heart, it hurt so bad. But He was doing a deep work in me. I continued along this path and occasionally there would be opportunity for sin, but He had surrounded me with such great community and His Holy Spirit would not let me stay there. No matter how many times I gave up on myself, He would never give up on me.

I’ve changed my phone # several times. I’ve blocked email addresses. I’ve called friends and confessed when I knew sin was lurking at the door. And sometimes I gave in. But always, always, always, God has picked me back up, dusted me off, and set me on the course of life.

I’m still discovering the true meaning of purity, but I know one thing. We now wear robes of righteousness. We now shine with His pure robe of goodness, and love, and forgiveness. When He sees us there is no condemnation.

That is my testimony.

Because I have tried again and again to condemn myself, but He wouldn’t hear of it. If God is for us then no one can be against us. 

We can not even be against ourselves.

I also now know that identity is key to walking out His purity. We must be awakened to His love and His value of us and embrace His truth about who we are above our own understanding (Prov 3:5-6). Our behavior does not define who we are, His Word does.

These are truths I hope to one day pass on to the next generation. These are truths I hope to continue walking in for the rest my own.


By Nicole D. Miller

Nicole D. Miller is an author and heartfelt writer, as expressed on her blog Better Than Wine. Her books are published at and on Amazon. She loves all things “old school” hip-hop and R&B, along with any outfit that involves cute boots and thick scarves. She even manages to run her own bookkeeping business ( when she’s not cuddling her cute cat she fondly calls, “Squeaks”.

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