I have not caught the bus in YEARS. Thank God for that! Before I had my own ride, I can remember hopping 2 or even 3 buses to hook up with an old love just to spend a few hours together and catch those same number of buses back home (why was I not thinking about having a man who owned a C-A-R?!). Even in middle school since I lived outside of my school district (which was illegal, but hey, my family did what they had to do to give me a good education) I would catch 2 city buses home. In Cleveland, Ohio we fondly call those city buses the “Rita”, also known as, the RTA. Even recently I had to pick my roommate up at the Rapid (train) station and my eyes popped out of my head when she said she was catching the bus to the Rapid so she could get her car out of the shop. “The BUS?” I said, like it was a bad, 4 letter word… “Whew, thank God for personal transportation!” But this morning, in my quiet time with Jesus, He gave me a picture in my heart. He was standing at the bus stop and asked me, “Nicole, will you wait with me…for the bus?” Hmmm Jesus, foreal? So I stand there, next to Jesus, waiting for this bus. Cuz he asked me to. That’s what these seasons of waiting feel like to me. Waiting for no reason. But what He told me this morning and was showing me, is that the waiting is not worthless. It is not time wasted because it is time spent with Him. As Jesus and I, stand there, waiting for this bus, I get to know Him. We conversate. I learn about His likes, His dislikes, His dreams, His hopes, His desires, etc…I share with Him about mine. And the more we stand there talking, the more my desires become like His. The more like Him I become. And I realize, the purpose of this waiting is not for Him, it’s for me. The bus is for me. Often I want to peace out and just cop a car which is faster and gives me control of the ride, but waiting for the bus is more beneficial for my character than taking the fast route. It’s humbling. It’s depending on something other than myself to get me where I need to go. And in truth, I’m not even sure where I need to go. So it’s better that I stick with Him, because He knows the way anyway.
This morning He also shared that even though my career is at a stand still and things are slow going in that area of my life, He is focusing on other areas in/with me. He’s done this with me in times past. This is His way with me. To focus on one area intensely, then back off and focus on other areas. If I understand what He is doing and why, I can rest in the fact that He is doing something and the waiting or standstill is not for nothing. That it is, in fact, movement. God is still moving. He is still moving in the waiting. He is moving behind the scenes. He is moving in other areas. He is eternal so He has moved in the future to bring about His purposes for the present.
So, with that being said, I’m just going to stand here for now. At the bus stop. And wait. With Him. Cuz He asked me to. And I love Him.