What is interesting about this journey is how God works in patterns in our lives. I feel like He has been so intentional to teach me in patterns. Usually the patterns pertain to my career, living arrangements and relationships. There have been seasons of intense pruning followed by seasons of overwhelming blessings. But then something happened with the pattern. It stopped. I fully expected it to continue like it had for the last 13 years. I fully expected the “promotion” or “blessing. But instead, there was more humility. More waiting. More pruning. I didn’t understand the hold up. Why wasn’t the blessing coming? Didn’t I pass the test?
At the end of last year I stood in victory having learned the lessons He was teaching once again. I felt unstoppable. I saw the pattern and felt like this faith walk was “cake”. What I soon learned and what He showed me was that I had “mastered” level 1 of my journey with Him. Now we are on level 2.
Level 2 threatened to take me out. I wasn’t used to this level. I wasn’t used to not having His presence or doubting His existence or feeling so utterly alone. I wasn’t familiar with this lesson. I had to stand on His manifest presence of the past. I had to stand on His faithfulness in my past. I had to stand on the love of the current community that surrounded me.
I am still standing.
Each day has been a challenge to walk forward, but each day I choose to do so. Even though I don’t feel His grace or strength, the fact that I am still standing is evidence that it is there.
I’m getting more revelation and understanding now of level 2. I kept trying to use my old weapons of warfare at this level but they were not working. I am having to learn to use new weapons and re-sharpen some of the old ones. I’m also learning there are so many levels to wholeness. I have chosen to get to the highest level so that I will be most effective for this generation. So that I may please my Father.
Even with its challenges level 2 offers so many blessings. There are open doors at level 2. There are new relationships, experiences and opportunities at level 2. There is reaping at level 2. I don’t have to try or strive, the open doors come to me. All I have to do is BE.
Psalm 46:10.
He is faithful to complete the work He started in each of us. And it will be His love, kindness, patience and grace to sustain us as we climb His mountain.
He is there, even when we do not feel Him. Bringing us to victory…