I am sitting here alone at the office with a ruler in my hand and a bank report laid before me. I enter the figures in the excel spreadsheet and find satisfaction in each line completed. Over and over my skill is confirmed. I was made for this. I think back on the years of complacency. I think back to the stretching and yielding and waiting. All for this. An open door I couldn’t have foreseen if I tried, regardless of the prophetic gift inside me.
I have the luxury to sip a great cup of coffee while talking to my bestie on my cell. I have that luxury because in this season, along with professional growth and skill enhancement, there is autonomy. I think back to the season before where I was micromanaged and nit picked for no good reason. Everything inside of me screamed, “I am a good associate! Why don’t you treat me as such? Why do you provoke me?!” but by the leading of the Holy Spirit I suppressed the scream inside and instead released it as a prayer. Released it as intercession for the very one provoking me. I did this for days, then months, then years. And there were glimpses of eternity in our conversations, this man that I prayed for daily. But the real change was within me. I was changing. Again.
I sit here and know that this is my reward. It didn’t come the way I thought it would, the way I felt it should, but it was tailor made for me.
I am so blessed to be growing professionally. To finally have this desire met after 3 long years of waiting. Of yearning. I am so blessed to be mentored in the art of entrepreneurship. I am so blessed to be using my gifts and talents which confirm all that was stirring in my heart all those years.
I have purpose.
But I had to find my purpose internally. I had to find that I was not made by a title or a job or a position. The position comes as a reflection of who we already are. And the Father skillfully, carefully, molds and shapes us in preparation for the gift.
There is no sweeter satisfaction than when hope is finally fulfilled. And it is now fulfilled.
Proverbs 13:12
Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.
If you would like to check out my recent YouTube video on the topic of contentment click here.
SHALOM
Hey Nicole 🙂 Not sure if you remember me but I used to be and still am a huge fan of your blog. I’d really love to reconnect with you so please drop me your email (I reached out to you on twitter too)
– Thembi (From South Africa) rhfhr
Hi, my email: nicolemiller@overcomingheartbreak.net